There's beeen a terrible misunderstanding

The Real Reason You Gave Up on Your Dreams (And How to Get Them Back)

And here we are in Installment 5 of “Ruby’s Life” — which I thought was going to be about the importance of how you hold your past, but that will be next week now because this installment turned into something else.

But first let’s recap…

• In installment 1 - So Beautiful, So Scary - Ruby notices having the feeling of being outside her life. Not really in it. She wonders why something as beautiful as a life should feel more like a burden than a gift.

• In installment 2 - When Life Feels Too Big - “I can’t!” energy wins the day and Ruby spirals into helplessness. Oddly enough, when she fully goes ‘there’ something shifts for her.

• In installment 3 - "Don't hesitate 'cause the world seems cold" - Ruby connects with the courage to re-enter her life… hoping that’s where the answers she needs can be found.

• In installment 4 - Succeed… or hate yourself - Ruby revisits long forgotten dreams and wonders if the size of her dreams is what sent her running from her life.

That kind of self-questioning has led to another possible reason for bailing on her dreams…

Many years after having shelved her dreams, Ruby has a very different take on what they’re saying to her. So much so that you have to wonder if they’re even the same dreams…

Isn’t that so much more… I don’t know, kind? I mean I’m all for the idea of setting a good ‘outrageous goal’ for the purpose of motivating yourself to new heights, to get in touch with any limiting beliefs that may be in the way of a bigger version of your life, to give yourself permission to shine. That’s cool. But turning your inner world into a battlefield as the means to that end?

No. Not cool. Not helpful. And not necessary.

Now Ruby wonders WHY she would have ever burdened herself with all that unhelpful, unnecessary pressure. And the answer is something we touched on in Succeed… or hate yourself. She was overly concerned with outcomes because of…

Hidden agendas

Remember? Those are when you’re going after something — like a dream — and without you even realizing it (hidden), what you’re really doing is trying to get needs that weren’t met once upon a time met NOW (agenda).

And the big problem with ‘hidden agendas’ is all the ‘battle’ and ‘proving’ that they add to something that should only be really cool and exciting to go after.

So yeah, looking back it’s clear. Ruby’s way of going after her dreams the first time around was loaded with…

And it wore her out. It made what should only have been really cool and exciting to go after… sucky (not all of the time, but enough of the time that it made her stop working on them).

Can you relate?

Have you ever felt like you need to prove something to someone (yourself, your parents, your peers, the world) because once you do, THEN you will finally feel WORTHY… SAFE… SUPPORTED... LOVED… VALUED… GROWING… enough?

Yeah?

Then you know.

And we’re going to tap on that today.

But before we do, let’s take a look at how things go for Ruby once she’s gotten her ‘hidden agendas’ out of her dreams. Which she did by… getting her very real needs met in much more direct ways. Maybe even right within herself by herself by re-parenting herself (a topic for another day).

Yay, Ruby!!!

Now let’s tap…

TAPPING TO RELEASE HIDDEN AGENDAS

FROM
battling and proving
TO
energized, focused and in action!

To tap on ‘hidden agenda’ type stuff, we’ll tap in a way that I call “TAP + TEACH” because even as we’re tapping what we don’t want OUT, and what we do want IN, we’re internalizing cool concepts. Concepts I have courtesy of one of my best mentors, Margaret Lynch Raniere.

I won’t be calling out the tapping points in this audio, so take it upon yourself to move to the next point with each new phrase. You can use the diagram above to remind yourself which point comes next… but don’t worry about the order, and don’t worry if you stay on one point longer than one phrase. That doesn’t really matter — tapping is a very forgiving process.

audio (8 minutes)

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Well, thanks for joining me in the unpacking of “Ruby’s Life”.

Next week I’ll give you a peek into what the real life Ruby (me, Jeanne) really did in regard to those dreams and what they turned into… and continue to turn into. Because it really is true that “it’s never too late to get back inside your beautiful life and attend to your beautiful dreams!”